Not Double Bay Rodeo Drive, Los Angles

It was getting quiet chilly now in the back of the Truck. I was very impressed with our drivers skills. It's amazing the automobiles around you on the approach to Rodeo Drive. We served in between Bentleys and Mercedes. 

On arrival at our destination the driver advised that we had 30 minutes only to Shop or brooze the drive. Also warned that the big yellow store will charge if you don't buy anything, further identification of the store marked by the big yellow Bentley outside. Since arrival in LA I couldn't believe how Gothic the fashion was and there it was smack in Rodeo Drive another Gothic outlet more style that Hot Topic. Channel, Cartier, it was all there strangley it felt a tiny bit like Double Bay. The girls hit Channel for sunglass's and I wanted to see as much as possible, I elected to window watch

Bel Air Bandits the Tour Continues

The Beverley Hills Cont'd  putting along in the Clampet Style Truck off to Bel Air.

A few house’s down we are outside Madonna’s but she is definitely not home, apparently she lives in New York these . The Material Girl leaves the place looking immaculate I must say.

A stroll down the hill and its Loni Anderson’s house no cant see that blonde mop doing the dishes at the kitchen window. Loni does like the drapes though by the looks of it.

Gosh the next place looks like Tara from Gone with the Wind; no it’s the house of Jane Wyman old movie star who was married to Ronald Regan.  Its beautiful and probably my favourite as I go through the slides. Franks Sanatra of course has owned at some stage many of the house’s on the trip. 

Leaving Madonna behind we are now in front of  JLO’s Pad. Jennifer Lopez gosh is that her sunbaking bye the pool,  just down the road from Jen’s we now hit the back entrance of the First 007 Sean Conery. Gosh his house goes on for hours and then we run into smack bang into George Clonney’s it never crossed my mind but George bought this house of his Aunt Rosemary Clonney, now George must be home there is a white BMW  in the drive. 

I actually have yawns on now so Rodeo Drive here we come. The Goth's are very quiet during the whole trip, I think they are worrried  about the tip at the end. So am I... 

 

The Beverly Hillbillies

Listen to a story about a man named Jed a poor Mountaineer but he kept his family feed.

Then one day he was shouting for some food a mist shot proved a spell of crude. Crude that is Oil. The next thing you know old Jed’s a millionaire and kin folk said “Jed you got move away from here,California is the place you got to be!So they packed up the truck and moved to Beverly Swimming Pools Movie Stars. 

These lyric started in my head  I saw the sign saying  Tour Hollywood and Beverley Hills. I thought why not.   As  if I had twitched my noise like Samantha in Bewitched. A  Spanish American was trying to lure me into a waiting Limo.

“Come on sir, see where the stars live for just $50 Us.”  A seasoned traveller would check with the hotel concierge first.  I had been caught by street hawkers before hotel price was nearly half. I said "Let's have a flyer and I will get back to you!" 

"okay if you got right now you can have it for $40." pushed the Hawker.

"No No I will let you know." understand I was firm.

I started to walk away  I had promised Miss Gothic New York State we would met outside American Apparel in 20 minutes. She conceded to drop down a level in the boots.  

"Sir  I will write down."  handed me a card. Scribbled special price $40. 

Amey appeared still with the 2ltr Water Bottle. 

Gringo Tour salesman assumed that Amey was my wife, also both English. 

"No No" Amey feel straight in “I am form New York.”  forgot to add the state I noticed, my Australian anecdote ignored.

I said “Do you want to do a tour.” Ignoring the persistent  guide.

“Weeeeeeeeeeeelllllllll How much is it?”

“Ah for you two English, I make special price” was heard.

“I’m from Australia”

“ Oh many Australian Peoples loves my tours”

Battering is not my style "How much for two?".

"I give two tickets and throw in Rodeo Drive for $80."

You cant bullshit a bullshitter. I said “That sill $40 each!” then used my two finger hand signal “$60 for us both and we go now!”

Handed over the $60 from my wallet thinking another $100 gone.

“Okay Ozzzie’s you be back here in half an hour we go 3.30”

Grrrh, I thought we were going now.

An embarrassed  Amey informs me she has no money and cant pay me back.

 I said “Oh buy me a drink or something at the hotel”. It  would be more fun with company.

Amey relived about the financial outcome then informed “Oh I have to go back to the hotel to let Michelle in first.”

I must have had a puzzeled look on my face as Amey advised another Sexy Hair Educator was flying in and sharing her room with her. Oh well life changes can be fun cant they.

After the shoe disaster I then took control “You go back to the Hotel then let what's her name in, and I am going to go back to Sketcher’s and check out the runners.” 

Back at Sketcher’s I was bombarded by Sales Assistants if you purchased three pair you got the third pair free. Well I was right into it. Found a brilliant pair of runners or should we say walkers, a groovy pair of sneakers, and my third pair was going to be a gift for new born Chelsea Russo Dalton, Lousies New Baby. Then confronted with the fact my foot was to big for anything I selected. The rather pushy sales girl tried to squeeze my big foot into a ½ size smaller advising of the stretch factor. No Way Hozey I looked at my watch and had 5 minutes to join the tour. I said “Thanks Girls this is not going to work.” 

Crossing Hollywood Bolovarde outside the Kodak Theatre, I saw Amey with a short woman dressed in standard hairdresser garb black thight t shirt stretched over massive bosoms and of course tradional black camel lip stretched trousers with flares and rubber platform black boots. I thought oh here comes Lilly Munster and Eddie. I was soon given an arm swing introduction to Michelle. Umm, I have this bad habit of naming people,she looked more like a Debbie. 

The Tour guide appeard and directed us to the bus. Michelle was also walking with us. Amey turned to her and said “Its $30 hoooooneeey”. I could see the look the Muse’s face and bingo “$30” was quarked out.

“No No $50 “ form the Gringo .

I shrugged my shoulders and Amey fanged up a great gothic look indeed.“Well were not going give us our money back”

“No Refunds Lady look at youra receipta it quote…”

Michelle interjected with “I am not paying $50” 

Luckly the Gringo then retreated and took Michell’s  30 bucks. Just as a big limo pulled up. Amey went to grab the passenger door.

“No No “ waved the Gringo.

He then pointed to this Blue Truck with lounges in the back and already ½ full of people. I laughed as Vampira Amey jumped in the front and I gave the new Muse a nudge up into the back of the truck. 

The driver then arrived and was also of latin decent and accent. It was an unusal accent sort American Drawling, with Spanish Dialetic and a parculiar English Rounding. “Ladies and Gentlemen welcome aboard,  I want you to know that we don’t get a salary for what we do so when we finish the tour your tip is my income!’

My eyes then went to a sign quoting tips for the guide rated on what you thought of the tour.Gosh what a cheek. Oh well my two tour compardrees would not being offering a tip Amey broke and Michelle not happy about paying the fare. I would think about it I decided.

 The bus takes off, with a kangaroo jump and surging occupents, around the block we go and down Sunset of the famous Sunset Strip  to see a Car Wash. Location for the  movie Car Wash. “Working at the Car Wash Yeah Car Wash” .

Then we cross Hollywood Blovarde and waiting at lights whats smack bang infront of us the Direcct Shoe Warehouse, it was up not down the street.  I dug Amey in the ribs.

Sunset Strip seems to go forever first up the famous Laugh Factory, were a lot of stand up comedy is born its graudates include Laugh In etc. To reinforce my thought that Sunset Strip must have been a Hollywood a thoroughfare 8000 Sunset-strip pops up a massive apartment complex. The whole strip is a mecca for advertising with bill boards everywhere. You really do notice that Hollywood is in a valley as you see more hills on route to Beverley Hills. 

Then the famous Chateau Marmont surprisingly the American’s had captured a European look with this one in the valley. Its featured in many films over the years and a star hang out, couldn’t see any from the bus.

Then Tiffany a bit of shock as the Tirrany’s I have visted over the years have been much more glamours settings. Tiffany is right on the Sunset Strip. The penny dropped everybody drives up to everything. That’ s why Tiffany looked more like a Super Centre than Chic Boutique like. 

The famous Saddle Ranch Bar Chop House at 8377 Sunset. The Saddle Ranch is used in lots of westerns, it has manquies positioned to give it that best little whore house effect.  Next the House Blues Bar home of  the Jazz enthusiast. Look right and you see The Comedy Store. As we drive amazed we are still on Sunset and constucton is well covered with posters as big as the multi story buildings. .We are informed that the rich and famous like to dine at Cucinia Italianan Pizzeria, and you can star watch there no problem. Now to our left is the famous Viper Room, of course reminded of Johnny Deep story. A little further down the track is the Wisky a Go Go a favourite hang out for the stars on a night out. Funny how the billboard above is promoting the Nip and Tuck Series. 

 Star Spotting now starts as we pull up out side Sand Towers the home of controversial Lindsay Lohen  cant see her and of course we are not told which floor she is shacked up on. In the forest hill we see a rather beautiful Country Lodge looking home set way back from the road but quiet visible this is the house they use for such movies like the God Father  lots of horrors, a sand store English type of residence. 

Next up is Tom Crusise’s new pad and big brick wall surrounds the property is that Katie up there mowing the lawn. Then just around the corner from Tom and Katie’s is a glimpse of  Beck’s and Posh’s new pad, Vicotria obviously has help with those window’s high up on the hill, gosh I bet soccer balls fly over those walls when Dave's in practice.

Just around the corner is a house with a car park of new Bentleys if I was mistaken you think to yourself this must be the Marfia Pad. No it’s the home of the Guest Label not bad for jeans and watch’s. So then we are off to Bel Air and that's another blog...

Hollywood These Boots are Made for Walking

Disgruntled nothing was happening today. I enlisted the Nike phrase “Let’s do it”.

 The test yesterday of hanging outside dressing rooms at Hot Topic Gothic Outfitters wasn’t my scene at all. Memories of the ripped black lace gloved early Madonna, Male, Blue Mohawk’d, size O Eurasian, sales assistant. ESC button needed now. 

A Light Bulb moment! Amey’s - Family. “Yes” 

This got a Traffic Police Stop Signal. Car Hire and a 4 hr round trip drive neither feasible. The Sister-In-Law made it clear no travelling to Hollywood. Amey wanted to see her brother on her terms only.

So too the recycle bin. 

Life coach’s Tony Jones action would have been “Hun, I will meet you there”. This equates to a no show. Shook, this off with “I can’t.” 

“Okay I will go shopping, I really want to check out the hotel gym and I need to find IPod head phones, runners, and I don’t want to spend much money. How about I met you back here at say 4.00 p.m., then we can do early dinner go to bed early and be fresh for tomorrow.”

Anticipating I’ll met you at 4.00 p.m. 

Amey’s hesitant reply “No I’ll come with you besides I spent way too much money on my outfit and I don’t want to spend anymore.” 

The opulent marble Grand ballroom hallway, filled with Academy Award Winning vintage gowns terminated at the entrance to the Highland Shopping Centre. 

My built in Alarm Bell sounded before me an Italian Restaurant, sitting behind the cocktail bar was a Coffee Barrister. Could it be a mirage created by my cafe addiction?

“Look”. Next stop a café a latté! a spring in my step and a smile on my dial, I walked up to the bar and said “Do you real European Style Coffee?”

“Sure” responded the Italian Barristete.

“Could I have a café late with an extra shot please.” Sydney Style I wanted to add.

A nod from the Café Couture and our eyes went to Miss New York State.

I prompted “and Amey will have?” waved my hand to her. “I’llllllllllll have (Pause) “Nothing”.

Not wanting to sit and drink alone in this swanky looking bar. “You sure, I will shout.”

Amey’s play button immediately sounded, a double large Ice Coffee.

I sat watching the lady go to work thinking this is going to be great. (Californian interpretation Awesome!)

The coffee arrived accompanied by the snowman style Ice coffee tall enough to yoyo at the Hollywood Hills sign. Enjoying, the aroma of the dark looking latte. Amey now had a nice looking Santa Claus moustache. I rolled my eyes. 

The coffee bubble soon burst. First taste a double shot never, more like warm milk. Bugger! Will I find a Grande Latte expectation, in this tinsel town Hollywood! 

Hot milk now consumed. My coffee buddy slurped up the last of the iced concoction with long stemmed spoon. The Cheque arrived. Knowing I had to add a tip no less than 16%. How they arrived at his ratio I will never know. Crickee, this came to $22 US Mr Bloomberg quoted the rate this morning at $1.53 so this little treat came to $33 Australia. Outrageous! 

Amey directed me to Sketchers’ for my runners. A known American Brand worn a few years prior and durable. Whilst I was perusing the racks and trying to convert the price to my currency Amey exited. Then back with news of a Direct Shoe Outlet on Vine St, reasonably priced runners. “Oh let’s go” I clapped. 

Riding the escalator down to Hollywood Boulevard Amey announced we needed to catch a Train. Recollection of a choo choo or the sound of a rattler did not come to mind. More information unfolded, Hollywood had a Metro, Vine Street was one stop. 

Both Hollywood Metro Virgin’s difficulty struck trying to purchase tickets. Rating a nil Metro savvy I couldn’t work out which button to press next! Witnessing our dilemma a local Californian offered help. Amey begrudgingly took the assistance. The man crunched the buttons, presto two singles Vine St. “You off to the matinee of Wicked then?” questioned the Ticket Magician.

“No just shoppennnn” Amey snapped. 

Proceeding down the stairs I noticed that not just the sound of the Rock Star High Healed boots was irritating, Amey’s step was lop sided or sending vibes of fainting or intoxication. The heal shuffle got louder on the decent. I turned in horror eyes widening to see the hand rail becoming like a trapeze and Amey now the artist. The Kiss Band look a like stiletto boots had gone into auto pilot take off the reams of gothic black material now swopping to bite the dust at the bottom of the stairs. The Gallant Ticket Magician was first to her assistance. 

Shaken and stirred like a fresh bloody Mary, confronting the situation of Amey lying on the tiles, being returned to a 45degree stance she announced. “Oh my god I need to get water real quick I am so dehydrated.” 

Hobbling now I suggested perhaps we should return to the hotel for water and exchange the animated boots. Whilst shaking off her Californian Aid with a snubbed “Thanks”. The expedition was going ahead, boots and all. 

Hollywood and Vine a hype of activity Limo Hummers pulling up outside a theatre another read carpet “Wicked” playing the matinee. The famous Capitol Records Building in circular shape the back drop of this famous address. Amey seemed to have the colour back in face. The bargain shoe outlet was nowhere in current view. 

“Dammmmmmmmm, she said it was outside the station!” as Amey scuffed her boots along the boulevard. "Must be down Vine” was my input.

We turned the corner in close distance a  shopping centre façade  with familiar Boarders Book Store Bed Bath and Table signage. I pointed it was about two blocks away. Amey omitting negative vibes “Nah, I don’t think so, its supposed to be here.”

“You will be able to get water” I said. Thinking those boots don’t want to walk that far.

“Okay” Amey took off at Vampire speed another sign of feet strangulation for sure. 

It wasn’t a Shopping Centre just separate stores on the side walk of a business centre. Amey made enquires to passing Californian’s as to the location of the shoe outlet. All giving vague responses or looking back at the tall Gothic clad Eastern American. 

A rather large sign appeared quoting Rite Aid. Clucks of happiness shrieked from Miss New York State as the familiar sign meant water also inserts for the boots as I was soon to witness.Rite Aid is an American Drug Store Chain, later in my travels I found this very handy and reasonable for mouthwash, chips and a bottle of wine. 

Amey flew around the isles to appear with a basket of goodies. Watching her proceed through the check out I noticed a rather large plastic bottle of demineralised water 2 litre size, another 4 row chrome headband, bandaids, a flip top roasted almond bottle. 

Whilst in the line up Amey started to do a dance called the “Roasted Almond Hokee Pokee. You put your right hand out and shake the almond bottle all about, then you cock your head back as far as you can, and shake that bottle and pour it down your throat and shake it all out then throw your head down shake your head all about and repeat. Try it with your next Fibre daily dosage. 

Outside the Rite Aid, Amey plonked herself down on a bench unwrapped the long laces of the boots and sighed she then pulled from the right aid bag shoe inserts which she placed in the boots. Then zig zaged the laces up the boot clips to initiate drive and stood up. Then proceeded to raise the 2 litre distilled water to her lips and suck like there was no tomorrow and then to signify her enjoyment let out a large belch or bull frog Burrup! All of this taking place on the corner of Sunset and Vine. Thank good the Papa Rattzi was getting ready for the Golden Globes. 

Finally we left Sunset and Vine with our Water and Rite Aid Supply’s, Gave up on the Shoe Store, and went back to the train, getting stunned looks from other travellers at our Gothic Amey clutching her 2 Litre Ironing Water Bottle. 

Back on Hollywood Boulevard outside the Highland, Amey was chased by a Pirate, (Street Performer) and snap went the camera’s obviously The Penzance Character had mistaken her for a fellow crew member. However Amey cooed with Joy!

Registration with Vampira Hollywood California

Looking smick, in a Ben Sherman Creation, (by my Sydney Stylist Clair) the coffee dilemma now archived until tomorrow. Time to start work Sexy Hair Rocks Day 1, so just about to leave and under my door a familiar looking letter head arrives. Sexy Hair Rocks it reads, Registration for the Conference is today between 11a.m. and 8 p.m. Instead of previous time of 10 am and 7pm. So, lets Rock! This is strange a whole day to register. I checked my file and I was supposed to be having dinner with Kevin and Lisa someone. Oh well lets go register. Just then my room phone rings.

“Mornnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnning, what you up too today”. The voice of Miss New York State.

My reply of course was “Off to the conference”.

“Oh no honey, you just register today and the rest of the day is ours!”

I agreed to meet in the hotel lobby in the next 30 minutes.

Camera, Phone and Wallet all in hand I went to the Hotel Lobby, waiting waiting 60 minutes gone bye no Amey. I then go and ask the concierge if I can use the house phone.

“I beg pardon Sir.”

I repeat “The House Phone.” I then revert to bush style sign language and do the thumb and extended finger sign to my ear.

“Sorry Sir of course.” The preppie blue Marriot Penguin spiv does a choreographed arm swing to direct me to the table with the house phone. Under my breath tutting over the no comprehend “A” thing.

 

Amey’s room rang out! Ready to leave for the Grand Ballroom to register, I spot this black shinny human bat looking thing coming through the swinging doors of the Hotel lobby. My god it’s Lestate from Interview with a Vampire, well we are in Hollywood. Wush Wush the bat winged cloak unfolds and it’s Amey from New York State shrieking “Isn’t this awesome!” “I went back to Hot Topic and changed everything”.

Well being one that is never stumped for words, I gave a swallow and blushed “Yeah”.

“You know I got a further 25% off!”

I then glanced at my new acquaintances feet to see laced up stiletto velvet boots with silver buttons that Gene Symons from Kiss would die for, also the elevation effect on height, Amey even taller than remembered.

“Okay let’s go register.” I said.

Instead back to my seat in the lobby while Vampira went to change.

 

On route to the Grand Ballroom, following the well signed hallways of the Renaissance, Amey is still raving about her new treads, how wonderful she is going to look on Sunday Night at Michael’s Party. (The Function is called MO Rocks; it’s the 10^th Anniversary of The Sexy Hair Range).

Reception Desk located, no matter what country you’re in you can spot a hairdresser a mile away.

 

I introduce my self and met The Sexy Hair Admin Girls and they hand me a silver engraver to sign a card for M O. Hollywood is all into initials you know remember JR, WC and KD. (Bye the way MO is Michael O’Rourke, Sexy Hair Guru.)

 

Bye this stage Amey is beside herself at signing a glassssssssss bowl for Michael. Silver Quill in hand I give it a go scratching my regards to a man I have not met yet. Pity my IPod was in my room, I could have engraved this at the same time.

 

Party note, crystal bowl or glass greeting card for next party. Might do this for Ronnie’s birthday instead of the canvasses like last year. Of Course Helen’s 30^th Mamma Mia Abba Party. How Glam. If you’re reading the Blog Heid’s make a note.

 

Desk No 1 name tag issue Robert Bool, Sexy Hair Rocks Label, your admittance to all venues, also told I am part of the Orange Team. To Amey’s disapproval who is in the green team. (What a relief). A Sexy Hair Rocks Button nice unusual. The Sexy Team are taken back with the Aussie Accent I’m being paranoid.

 

Desk 2 gifts, a beauty case filled with New Silky Sexy Hair Products. The case black and silver and port fashioned. Can’t wait to show these finds to Annabelle. All this signing and receiving comes to a close and that’s it.

 

One of the nice Sexy Hair girls explains “Get nice and relaxed today as the next two days there’s a lot on”.

 

Scanning the Agenda I notice its hands on Cutting. Wow how are they going to do this with all these people?

 

Looks like it’s another day hanging in Hollywood with

Amey,

“Let’s go Shopping” as Miss New York State bellows from bended knees adjusting the Kiss boots.

 

Let’s Rock!